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Rock and Roll is the Devil’s Music: Newly Discovered Copyrights Reveal

Turns out the Portland Standard had ‘proof’ Satan has been behind Rock and Roll all along….

The Portside Standard

devil

A newly discovered copyright, reveals Satan had in fact copyrighted the music as early as 1905.

“I was just looking for a fresh sound for my band,” reveals Satan over mimosas, “we just wanted to do something for the fans, screw the critics man.”

Satan also revealed his band, Satan The Four Horseman are about to go on a world tour, but will miss their she-devils back at home.

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Right Wing Rant: ‘Obama is a Communist Plant That is Selling the Soul of America to the Devil’

Right-wing ranter Avi Lipkin is back with his anti-Muslim, anti-Obama rhetoric. Appearing on Dove TV, Lipkin spread the (false) idea that Obama said he would never to war against the Muslim world.

“He said this in his book that he will never go to war against another Muslim country,” Lipkin said. He continued his rant by saying Obama was actually going to play host for the Muslim world, in an event the obviously ends with Obama selling the soul of the American people to the devil.

“They’re going to come to the United States and the Muslim president is going to receive them,” Lipkins warned. “It’s a horrible situation for the United States in my opinion unless people think that selling the soul of America to the Devil is a good thing.”

Photo Credit: Charles Fettinger

Is Satan Dead?

Ideas

Son of God opened in cinemas across America this weekend, but minus the Bible’s most cunning, controversial and diabolical character. No, Judas Iscariot is in the movie. It’s the evil one himself – known reciprocally as Satan, Lucifer, or the devil –  who has lost his iconic role.

Satan’s fall from stardom gives rise to rumor. Where did he go, and why? Can it be there is a more important role to play, an offer more lucrative? Or, has the unimaginable come to pass: Is Satan dead?

The film’s executive producers, Roma Downey and her husband, Mark Burnett, are not ducking the swirling questions concerning the villain’s swift departure. Irish-born Downey, who also plays Mary, the mother of Jesus, in the film, recently told USA Today, “It gives me great pleasure to tell you that the devil is on the cutting-room floor. This is now a movie about Jesus, the…

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Will Smith’s Lucifer is the Suave Type: A 2014 Guide to Movie Satans

Will Smith’s uncredited  appearance in Winter Tale as a t-shirt wearing, basement-dwelling Prince of Darkness has caused a lot of buzz.  Not only is the former Fresh Prince a charmer, but, except for the fact his job entails passing judgement on the forces of evil, he could easily blend into the hipster crowd at the local coffee shop (although being pure evil, I am sure he would not bring a reusable cup).

According to Vulture, this suave, sexy Satan that could easily blend into New York City and corporate life is a common Satan archetype in movies.  Anna Silman describes as the suave type as follows:

Long before the Devil Wears Prada, the metaphor of devil-as-corporate-boss was given the most literal possible treatment in The Devil’s Advocate. In the 1997 film, Al Pacino plays a smooth-talking, charming lawyer who just happens to be prince of the underworld (although his menace here pales in comparison to his later turn as real-life evil lawyer Roy Cohn, in Angels in America). The Suave Devil, which gains its newest member with Will Smith’s performance in Winter’s Tale, exemplifies greed, charm, power, and good tailoring, and has become a popular way to portray Satan while simultaneously assailing the character of bankers and lawyers. Other Suave Devils you know: Gabriel Byrne as the devil inhabiting a Wall Street banker in End of Days; Robert De Niro as a dapper devil with a cane in Angel Heart; Peter Stormare in Constantine (which Goldsman also produced) as a devil whose snazzy all-white ensemble stays dry-cleaner spiffy even while plunging his hands into Keanu Reeves’s chest cavity.

Silman’s taxonomy of devils also breaks down other common devil types, including little devil, benign devils and classic flame dwellers.

Read more about Silman’s movie devil taxonomy here.

Or watch what may be the best movie portrayal of a Devil ever (which Silman dubs the mischievous type) when Jack Nicholson asks the good, church-going people of Eastwick, “Do you think God knew what he was doing when he created women?”